Romance Novel Rant: Not So Sincerely, Yours By A.M. Johnson

Blurb:

Ethan, about last night… I could blame the bourbon. I could say I let things get out of hand, that I should have never called you, but I’m done lying to myself—to you. I know what you’re going to say. You’re not very good at keeping your opinions to yourself, but this can’t happen. It’s inappropriate, at best. I’m your boss. Not to mention, you’re clearly still hung up on him. I’m not a consolation prize. 

Anders~ 

** 

Anders, you didn’t think it was inappropriate when you had your tongue down my throat, but I digress. As for your accusation, I’m not the only one stuck in the past, but at least I’m not running from it. I can’t believe I’m about to say this… Maybe you’re right. You shouldn’t have called me. Especially if you never intended to own it. Own that you wanted it to happen. Admit that you wanted me. 

Not so sincerely, 
Yours

*****

Writing at 54%

Second book of For Him series by A.M. Johnson. I friggin loved the first book. I love Jaxon and Wilder. I never wanted the book to ever end.

In this book I still get to see Jax and Wild — Yaaayyy! They’re just so adorable ♥️ Anyhoo — Back to the two main characters. Anders and Ethan. Uhmmm. Yeah. Something about their “pacing” and “push and pull” doesn’t sit right with me. Their attraction doesn’t seem natural (?) and somehow too forced. 

Ethan is just too abrasive, has no sense of boundaries and personal space. He’s toooo intrusive. Too nosy. Anders on the other hand is a complicated man. Uptight and closed like a turtle in its shell. I understand where he comes from, his trauma and all. However, I feel like he really needs to find his own voice and just stay true to himself. I think he’s a people-pleaser.

Now…Talking about Ethan being a little too much, Anders described it perfectly earlier in the book: “judgmental.” Yep that’s the word. He makes assumptions and judgments about everything and sooo stubborn about it. Bet you bottom dollar he’s a Scorpio. Intense, pushy, inflexible, and judgmental. Remember how I disliked his pushing and forcing Jax to actually have sex with him in book 1? Yeah man it ain’t right. You 👏🏿 sound 👏🏿 needy 👏🏿 ..and desperate 🤦🏼‍♀️

Anders — I feel you boo. Do things at your own pace. You’re doing amazing. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone. If things are meant to be, they will be. Especially when it comes to relationship.

Gotta pause the book for a bit and get it all out of my chest cavity. Now I feel a little bit better. Let me continue reading…

*****

DNF at 56%

I fucking hate Ethan. So opinionated. So pushy. So ignorant. So selfish. Please replace him. Kill him or something. Pleaseeeeeee!!!

Romance Novel Rant: Shattered Glass by Dani Alexander

Blurb:

A male prostitute, a mangy cat, a murder and a maniacal mix-up that threatens his career, his impending marriage and his life. Nothing is going as planned for Austin Glass.

Austin—seems to have it all. At least on the surface. A loving fiancee. A future with the FBI and a healthy sized trust fund. He also has a grin and a wisecrack for every situation. But the smile he presents to everyone hides a painful past he’s buried too deeply to remember. And his quips mask bitterness and insecurity. Austin has himself and most of the whole world fooled. Until he meets someone who immediately sees him better than he sees himself.

As events unfold and Austin’s world unravels, he finds himself pushed into making quick life-changing decisions. But can he trust Peter or what’s happening between them when each meeting seems to be just a series of volatile reactions?

Goodreads Rating (as of June 19, 2021): 4.07/5.00 (9,026 ratings)
My Overall Rating: 2/5
Writing Rating: 5/5

*****

DNF at 83% (Major rant with possible spoilers)

What a waste of my time. I’ve had this book on my to-read list for several years honestly but every time I picked it up for some reason I always put it back down. Now I know why! Bitch.

My dislike for this book aside, I love the writing. The author is brilliant with words and the banter and jokes are on point. So I’m sure their other books are much better? You can’t write that well and have bad books. Maybe I just have bad taste that’s why I don’t like this book. I don’t know. I’m sorry? 🥺

Anyhoo — Hate the book. I hate it. Can’t stand it no more. Austin is a stupid, lame-brained asshole who’s got his head so far up his ass it’s tragic really.

Fall in love with a whore you’ve known for 1 week? Oh did I mention he was “straight” and has had 4 failed engagements because he cheated on all his exes. And the last one he literally jilted 1 week after meeting the whore, 8 weeks away from his marriage. No fucking, no dates, no getting to know each other. Just like that, broke off the engagement. Like, who is this idiot?

The whore is called Peter. A pathological liar. Oh mind you apparently he’s gay-for-pay and if he has to choose he would go for pussy instead of dick. He’s also an idiot and very passive-aggressive. Oh oh oh, he’s not smart and like dropped out from high school. BUT! He speaks 7 languages LMAO. La la land?

It just doesn’t make any sense to me. Not only that, the storyline gets weirder and more unnatural the more you read. Even writing this is just so mentally-draining really. So I’m gonna end this rant right here bitch. Don’t read the book. Sorry not sorry.

Love,

Scandal

Poem: Was It Me Or You?

Was it me or you?
The one who changed
After all these years
Memories and times shared together
Building hopes and dreams
But then they were shattered to pieces
Just cuz we’re not the same people anymore

What happened to all the promises and sweet talks?
Our small casual talks about life
About how it’s you and me against the world
But now it seems like those things never existed in the first place
There’s just me,
and you,
Two people sitting across a huge empty room, yet it feels like we’re in two totally different places

Was it me or you?
After all these times,
It feels like we’re back to square one
Just two souls who somewhat got brought together in one random occasion
I don’t know whether it’s fate or stupid cupid playing his dirty little trick, as always.
Or maybe it’s just you.
There was something quite indescribable about you.
I believe it was your stupid smile
Or maybe it was me who was smiling from ear to ear as I first landed my eyes on you

I don’t really understand how this happened
We’re playing the dance again
Where have all the years gone by?
I feel so lonely and dejected
I feel empty
I feel nothing
Numbness is the only feeling I know
But the irony is, numb is not a feeling
Cuz how are you suppose to feel numb?
But somehow it’s possible when it comes to you
You and me
But now I think it’s just me
Which makes me question, who are you?

Was it me or you?
If it was you just tell me so I probably can rest in peace
Was it me?
Or was it you?
Or worse.
Neither.

Romance Novel Rant: Love Always, Wild by A.M. Johnson

Blurb:

Wilder, when I left that night, I had every intention of coming back to you. To us. But no matter how hard I wish for what I want, there are some things in life that aren’t meant to be. I don’t expect you to understand. You’ve already moved on, living your life. But mine ended that night, nine years ago, and I still can’t let you go. Not sure I ever will. I regret so many things, but hurting you, I’ll never forgive myself. I’m sorry for…everything. Jax~

****

Jax, if only you could’ve seen it like I did, the way you were when you thought the world wasn’t watching. How you’d change when I looked at you, when it was just us.
But most of all… I wish you could’ve seen how much it hurt me when you disappeared. Regrets are for cowards. It has always been my belief you should chase after the things you want with actions, not words. There is no such thing as never meant to be. So this apology… not accepted… Love always, Wild

*****

Goodreads rating (as of June 18, 2021): 4.27/5.00 (1,234 ratings)

My overall rating: 4/5 (I just wish the story was longer, especially after they got back together) — My new favorite read in 2021 ♥️

Writing at 51%

This book is…intense. I’m only halfway through and my feelings are raw from reading it. Jax and Wild…I don’t know man 😂 My my my.. 9 years apart. 9 years of being hung up on someone. 9 years of not being able to move on and move forward with life. Do you know how long 9 years is bitch? That’s 365 days times 9. That’s 3,285 days. That’s 78,840 hours. Now let that sink in. 9 years is basically your high school + college + some more years! BITCH 😂 I can’t wrap my mind around it. I was once hung up on someone. It took me 2 years to move. It felt like forever.

Anyhow — back to Jax and Wild. Difficult y’all. I can’t really judge. “I’m not good with words like you, Wild. Never have been and never will be.” Said Jax. Ain’t that the truth? Easier said than done. When you’re lost in life, things aren’t black and white. Everything gets so fucking confusing. So my heart aches for both Jax and Wild. But if I’m forced to choose? I’d say Jax should’ve at least texted Wild.

And this thing with Ethan?! BITCH 😂 I am soooo envious. Now hold on let me get this off my chesticle: pussy ass hoe mothertruckin heiffer!!! 😂 My self-inferiority-and-fear-of-abandonment-and-rejection rears its head the entire time giiiirrrrllll!!! 😂 It’s as if I was Wild reading the entire thing. Like bitch, you were eye-fucking him for tens of pages. Jerked off to the image of him giving you head. Made out with him. GOSH! 😂 😂 😂 Stab my heart with a fucking knife over and over again. Lord have mercy.

I wish Jax’s groveling and redemption worth all this pain though. OK let me read the rest. See y’all in a bit.

*****

Writing at 100%

Aaawww…peaches and cream. That’s all I’m gonna say. So hopelessly, utterly sweet. Such a beautiful story. I never want it to end. I wouldn’t mind another 200-300 pages just to see how their love and relationship progress. Thank you, A.M. Johnson. For restoring my faith in humanity 🥺 See this is the sole reason why I read romance novels. To exactlyyy feel this feeling in my chest right now. To feel this bubble of joy and happiness. To know that everyone deserves a happy ending. To know that there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. Go grab this book and read it, NOW.

Love and kisses,

Scandal

An Ode To My Unique Self

You are unique.

You are one of a kind.

You are an unrepeatable miracle.

You are meant to stand out.

You are meant to be different.

You are meant to take the road less traveled.

You are meant to be an enigma.

You are meant to be misunderstood.

This is your path.

This is your destiny.

Embrace it.

Welcome it with open arms.

The more resist, the stronger it persists.

The less you resist, the more peace you get.

Learn to draw strength from deep within.

Learn to love yourself.

Your flaws, your weaknesses, your differences.

And see you soar high into the sky.

Free like a bird.

And be the shining star that guides all the lost wanderers.

It’s you. Always been and always will be you.

You and yourself.

Say it with me, it’s always been me and will always be me.